Angry Birds

 I avoided Angry Birds for a long time. Partly, I blame Hitchcock, though I also blame the fact that I've never owned a phone that responded to my touch except when I pushed the buttons. Ahh.. there was some kind of hilarious innuendo there, but I just couldn't put my finger on it. Anyway, with the computer release of Angsty Avians, I nabbed a copy to give it a try. Like millions of other people, I found it elegantly simple, charming, and entertaining- for perhaps 3 minutes.

If you've played a free, internet flash game in the last decade, you'll be incredibly familiar with the premise of Angry Birds: you take a projectile, and you shoot it at something. Aim is set by choosing an angle and setting velocity, then you watch your beaked-ball fly at its target. This particular version of that tired convention at least tries to add a bit of depth to the experience. Several of the projectile types have additional abilities that can be activated after they are fired. Some gain afterburner, some clone themselves, and others poop explosives. No joke. 

The different bird types are also important in relation to the specific puzzle being tackled. The objective of each level is to hit pigs with your birds, because they stole your eggs. Fair enough. But like the piggies who thwarted the wolf, these little pigs build their houses of sturdy materials. Some of the birds can drill through wood, others easily shatter glass, and some poop out bunker-buster bombs to get through the concrete. If you are noticing a bit of repetition in my writing, good. If you find it annoying and boring, then Angry Birds is not a game for you.

For an incredibly cheap price, Angry Birds is not a bad game. You get some nice art, amusing sound effects, and passable objectives. Of course, it's not exactly a great game either. It requires little thought outside of trial-and-error, and excitement is entirely absent. However, if you have a fancy phone with a touch-thingy and you need something to do between ordering your coffee and getting it- or inhaling and exhaling, then Angry Birds if perfect for you. If you want entertainment for longer than half a minute, then you would do best to look anywhere else.